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You are lucky, your son can read and write himself. My daughter never learns on her own. she has no interest and I am not sure why children don't like to learn, It is great that your son has developed a love for learning on his own! - my friend told me.

Many parents struggle with getting their kids to learn on their own, either children don't have an interest or they are very reluctant to do their assignments. Though my friend is looking for a tutor to help her kid, I was very fortunate that my son became an independent learner without much effort on my part.

I'm not sure exactly when or how this happened, but I think there are a few things that contributed to it.


I was very clear to introduce reading to him as early as possible- 

I started reading to him from a young age, even before he could talk. I think this made him curious about books and words, and he started to understand that they had meaning. He would ask me to read to him all the time, and when he was a bit older, he would "read" along with me, pretending to read the words himself.

I was very conscious of the fact that I wanted him to have access to books, even if we couldn't afford to buy them all ourselves. So, every month, I would take him to the library and let him pick out a few books that he wanted to read. This way, he always had something new to read, and he was never bored.

I think the combination of me reading to him and his having access to books meant that he started to see reading as something enjoyable, rather than a chore. And once he realized that reading could be fun, he became quite motivated to learn how to do it himself.

Of course, other things helped as well. He's quite an independent child in general, and he's always been very good at problem-solving. So I think those traits also contributed to his becoming an independent learner.

I never forced him to play with certain toys or read certain books. I would just introduce him to different options and let him choose what he wanted to do. This helped him find his interests, and he started to become more passionate about the things he loved.

Though I have a collection of non-fiction books for him to read I know I can't force him to like them and he would read them only when he is genuinely interested in the topic. He is most inclined to mystery books and I give him the space to read whatever he wants.

But I do talk to him and share stories of nonfiction books/events in other forms, like conversations, movies, documentaries, articles, etc. This way he still gets exposed to different topics and information, even if he's not reading about them himself.


I never make a big fuss of his scores or assignments- 

I've always tried to downplay the importance of grades and test scores. I want him to understand that learning is more important than getting good grades.

I think this attitude has helped him to be more relaxed about his learning. He doesn't feel like he has to perform perfectly all the time, so he's more likely to take risks and try new things.

I always focus on the skills that he needs to develop rather than the grades he gets.

I would rather work on what can be done to help him with his maths sums than worrying

I think the key is to create a love for learning in your child, rather than trying to force them to learn specific things. If they enjoy the process of learning, they will be more inclined to do it on their own, without you having to nag them all the time.


I always encourage him to ask questions- 

I always encouraged him to ask questions, about anything he was curious about. I think this helped him understand that it was okay to not know something and that it was also okay to ask for help. He started asking more and more questions as he got older, and he would often go off and research things on his own when he was curious about something.

We look for answers together, either through books, the internet or by talking to people who might know more about the topic. This has helped him to become a very inquisitive learner, and he's always exploring new things and asking questions.

I take his questions and doubts quite seriously and we try to look for answers together. This has helped him understand that it is okay not to know something and that it is also okay to ask for help.

I constantly research and organize resources for him that he can explore on his own. This has helped him become a very inquisitive learner. I have added some resources on my website in the product section, you can check them out. Some of the lists are inspired by the questions he asks me.


I let him explore his interests- 

I think it's important to let your child explore their interests, rather than try to force them to learn specific things. My son has been taking interest in music and he was very passionate about it. I got him a piano and I could see how he used to get lost in his playing.

He also takes interest in coding and loves to experiment with different computer programs. I try to support his interests as much as possible, and I think this has helped him to become a more independent learner.

He likes cars and wants to know everything about them. He often goes online and reads about different car models, and he's even started trying to fix his car.

Adi likes to write and he maintains a blog where he writes about his interests. This has helped him to develop his writing skills.


I try not to load him with my expectations- 

I think it's important to not put too much pressure on your child and to let them learn at their own pace. We need to understand that our kids are not our wish-fulfilling robots, they are individuals with their talents and abilities.

He is free to say no to something if he doesn't want to do it. Forcing him to do something will only make him resentful and he is less likely to want to do it.

But I introduce him to different activities and events so that he can make his own decision about what he wants to do.

Most parents are very fixed about what they want their children to achieve, but I think it's important to let them find their path in life.


I help him schedule his day- 

I try to help him schedule his day so that he has enough time for all his activities. I want him to learn how to manage his time efficiently, and this is one of the most important skills he needs to learn.

He has a lot of different interests, and he needs to find time for all of them.

He prefers to work on his projects in the morning, so he can spend the rest of the day exploring and playing.

I think this helps him to be more relaxed and less stressed about his learning. He knows that he has time for all his interests, so he doesn't feel like he has to perform perfectly all the time. He makes his plans and there are days when things don't go according to plan, and that's okay.


How as a parent I work to achieve this?

I think the most important thing for parents is to be well informed about their child's needs and interests. With this knowledge, they can better support their child's learning. They can provide resources and opportunities that will help their child to become a more independent learner. Most importantly, they need to be patient and let their child learn at their own pace.

An active parenting role is very crucial in the development of an independent learner. Also, understanding the child's needs, strengths and weaknesses can help parents to better support their child's learning.

This also means we need to spend time with our kids and know their interests and activities. 

With a little effort, you may be surprised at how quickly your child takes to learning on their own!

Posted 
Sep 20, 2022
 in 
Skills For Future
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